I'm sure you'll be delighted to know that I've just
washed my hands. It wasn't easy, despite having a half-full pump
dispenser of beautifully scented liquid soap in my bathroom. It looks so
elegant, standing there on a white china tray, but will it give me any
soap? No it damn well won't! I've tried pumping it at a
variety of different speeds. I've tried unscrewing the top and washing
out the tube. I've tried diluting the soap liquid (which is very thick
and gel-like). Not a splot. Eventually I just unscrewed the top
again and poured some out. As I replaced the dispenser on the tray, I
swear it gave a self-satisfied, ladylike little snort to its twin, the
handcream bottle. I didn't give her the satisfaction of
even trying to extract some handcream on this occasion, as I know very well
that she's just as reluctant to part with her contents.
Why do manufacturers put toiletries in bottles
that you can't get them out of? Do they really think that we'll
just throw away half-full bottles and buy more of the stuff?
I refuse to be beaten by a bit of plastic, but I'm reluctant to take the
breadknife to it just yet, as I did with my moisturiser bottle a little
while ago. When I'd finally sawn the bottle in half, there was
enough moisturiser in the bottom for another two weeks! Unfortunately,
the way I was screwing up my face with the effort of the sawing process
has just given me more wrinkles, so it probably wasn't worth doing.
